sex is for sluts!

Sex is for sluts!

The two readings on sexuality for young women is very interesting to me because I agree with it so much! As a young girl, the whole idea of being called a slut for having sex or being a prude for being a virgin was an issue. Especially during high school because everyone knew everything that went on in the party scene. Girls are so confused these days because of the images that men strive to obtain from average girls. Porn is not real life! In FFF, when she discusses how porn is fake and acted, she is telling the truth people. I used to hate when I walked into my friends’ apartment and a bunch of porn posters were hung on the walls. It was very awkward because not only do I not look like them but also they give this vulgar image of what girls should be to get a guy. In the blackboard article, the girls state their confusion with sex because either your too loose or you’re a prude for being a virgin. Which is it boys? Girls struggle so much with being called sluts and it is really a degrading word. My brother is only 13 years old and already makes extremely sexual comments about girls at his school. For all I know he is having sex already. He talks about girls like they are dogs and it disgusts me. Men need to stop having such high standards for women and maybe they would actually be satisfied sometimes. Girls themselves play a huge role in why we are looked at in such vulgar ways. Girls Gone Wild, you disgust me! Even in my most drunken stupor I could never bring myself to flash someone or do sexual things to men. I guess I just have some self respect!

The Sell Out

The reading on body Ethics and Aesthetics Among African American and Latina Women brought up some interesting points about both cultures. The African American women base beauty upon attitude, style, personality, and presence. In contrast, the Latina women based their beauty on health and disease. However, the portrayals of Latina women in the media have changed compared to the reading and their cases. Now we see more Latinas in the media in a variety of different ways. One of the participants mentions Selena and Jennifer Lopez, two beautiful Latinas with much success in the music and fashion industries respectively. Selena is one of the best examples I can think of that represents a Latina! She overcame obstacles and barriers that kept her from reaching her dreams and goals. Her family was of Mexican descent but she grew up here not knowing much of their culture and had trouble with her Spanish. Despite all of this she was a successful Latina woman loved by all. Nowadays we have Latina girls being called "sell outs", "agringadas", or "pochas". They get these terms because they aren't fluent in Spanish or they side more with the American side than their Latina side. Some of them are even ashamed to be at all associated with their Latina backgrounds and do whatever it takes to not fit into the category. As the authors of, Body Ethics and Aesthetics Among African American and Latina Women mentions, some girls will go as far as dying their hair or wanting to lose weight to fit into the stereotypical image that they see in the media. I think it is important for girls to stay in touch with their Latina side and be proud. Embrace your culture and spread it so others learn about you and the beautiful country you come from. I believe that knowing your culture is as important and necessary in order to know where it is you come from.

To be or not to be

There was a point in time where being fat meant wealth and beauty. Only the rich had access to large quantities of food and showing your large body was the way to show off your wealth. Even for women, being big meant being beautiful. But as more people had access to food and with science and technology on the rise, the meaning of beautiful quickly became altered.

More recently, being skinny means wealth and beauty. Only the rich have access to cosmetic surgeries and weight-loss operations and by showing off your plastic face, plastic boobs, and flat stomach you show off your beauty and wealth. Cosmetic surgery was initially intended for those individuals with deformities or accident caused disfigurations. Also, weight-loss operations were initially to prevent health issues for those individuals who were extremely obese. Then, the media started to send out this hidden message (aimed toward women) – you are ugly and fat, so do something about it. Solutions? Buy cosmetics, stop eating, lose weight, get under the knife!

Interestingly, China has found an increased popularity in which to show wealth and beauty…by breaking a leg, literally! Only the rich have access to break a leg or two – on purpose. According to Watts, Russia initially developed this procedure for people with stunned growth (p.286). However, with the increase in class separation and western beauty influence, undergoing this procedure has become more popular. Although Watts, states these operations are done to find jobs, marriage partners and to match their foreign counterparts, the doctors are stating that their customers are increasingly driven by cosmetic motivations.

It is interesting to see how science and technology have been used to alter ideals of beauty. It would not be surprising to find out in the near future that there are more cosmetic surgeries being performed than what it was originally intended for (reconstructive surgery, hand surgeries, treatment of burns, etc). Now I can only ponder on this question, what will beauty look like in the future, when most people can afford cosmetic surgeries and can afford to break a leg?

Look in the Mirror

What do you see when you look in the mirror? When I look at myself, I see a girl as “normal” as I could be. Yes, there is definitely room for improvement to make me feel better, but it is not the kind of improvement where I want surgery or loads of make-up and hair care to give me a better look. I want a natural improvement. And I would have to agree with the things said in the reading on body ethics by the participants about how some of them grew up and view their body today. Instead of looking at your body and trying to fit that perfect image of a perfect look/body type [that of a skinny, beautiful white woman like on all the magazines], people should just take care of themselves! This includes (as some are mentioned in the reading) watching what you eat to stay healthy, accepting what was given to you and valuing it, showering daily and dressing decently in clean clothes, combing your hair, etc. Presenting oneself and being confident about it is very important, no matter how curvy you may or may not be, or with any other features you may have that you think don’t fit what is to be “pretty”. I know that it’s said women of color are “protected” from these body images we expect [among white women], but it still goes for everyone. Geez, even guys have an image to uphold: being big and masculine. I would say that how you treat your body through hygiene and fitness for health reasons is a big factor, rather than just caring about looking like a Barbie doll. “Beauty is how one carries and cares for oneself.” I keep my head up and stand here proud to be who I am, no matter what people have to say about what I look like. I am personally trying to improve my body so I can stay healthy and fit and live a long and active life. I’m taking care of myself, for me. Now, will you look in the mirror and accept yourself, or judge what you see through others eyes?

No pain, No gain

After reading the article "China's Cosmetic Surgery Craze", I was surprised at just how important plastic surgery has become nation wide. I think that the whole idea of being perfect and fitting the certain look has been blown way out of proportion. Until reading the article I had never heard of leg-lengthening. I think the media portrays this perfect image to women by setting the bar so high out of reach that these women will do anything to get there. I always thought plastic surgery was dangerous and should only be performed on severe deformities, not just because they want bigger boobs. Plastic surgery has great risks and doesn't always go as planned. When a women does one surgery, she soon becomes addicted and begins finding a million different flaws that she wants fixed by cosmetic surgery. Women try so hard to live up to the "barbie doll" look by getting multiple procedures, and often they end up looking worse than they did before. A lot of women often regret getting plastic surgery because it's irreversible. I think there should be a limit and some validating reasons as to why they want the surgery in the first place. I can't even imagine getting my legs broken and stretched just to compete with others in China. If that is what they have to do to get in to law schools, certain jobs, and even help find a marriage partner, it's really sad. It's clear that plastic surgery has been taken way too far.

Carving desire

It’s amazing how us in the United States compare and seek the media to define beauty, then we judge on the morality of the situation. We bag on all these celebrities who place themselves in plastic surgery for some boob implants, redoing the nose or liposuction; and these celebrities are not asian. I haven’t seen much of the famous Latin Americans or Asians in the U.S. hitting the tabloids in a negative way as much as the white celebrities. The Latinas or especially Asians have not been as popular to begin with. After reading China’s Cosmetic Surgery, it surprised me to think how a third world country can go so far into being as similar to a foreign country, the Europeans. I learned in History, that the Europeans are dominating, and now I truly believe they have been from the beginning.

I couldn’t believe how popular leg-lengthening is in China! Who knew that in such a big country, a person’s appearance, including men, meant everything; from your job to your marriage. You have to be a certain height in order to be admitted into getting specific jobs, to take a driving test and even to get into law school? I’m so fascinated, amazed and yet so disturbed at the same time. It hurts me to think that this kind of mentality does not seem to be a problem in this country, that it is the rule and no exception. This is part of their oppression that they can’t escape, they have no freedom. This led me to think everyone has this in our world today. Women are still trapped in the oppression of men’s domination, subconsciously. In Afghanistan, Muslim women are to hide their hair, to keep their “Kabul” and hide their identity.

In Asian countries, and not just China, getting eyelid surgery is not a big deal. I know a few “asian” friends who go to Korea in order to get this surgery, because it’s cheaper! It’s cheaper than in the U.S. and that must mean something. It’s as popular and normal in Asia as getting a tattoo in the America. Why do this? To assimilate their eyes to the Europeans, Whites, Western ideals. Everyone is trapped in this desire to be something, someone better.

Asia and cosmetic surgery, a curse from America

Well, after reading the article China's Cosmetic Surgery Craze I honestly found this to be old news. Height was always something that people wanted. What I got from this article however, is that the want to be tall has turned into a need. As proved when the article describes height limits for men and women to obtain certain jobs. I have witnessed this in other countries as well such as the Philippines where the military height limit is 5 foot 7 inches. What has also become a need is plastic surgery to make one more beautiful. In order for actresses to maintain their jobs they need to change their bodies to accommodate a more American look. Cosmetic surgery has become a thriving business not only in China but also in Japan, Korea, the Philippines, and various other Asian countries.

There is something in common with these countries.
I will ask you a question.

Who do these countries trade with the most when it comes to a country outside of the Asian continent?

The answer is America.

The problem in other words is us. Us the American people who put such emphasis on looks, who are assumed to be naturally tall, and who have no problem spending money on cosmetic surgery to fix whatever we decide is ugly. These countries mind you don't really trade with Europe. The majority of products created in these countries go to the United States. In turn our companies set up in Asia further spreading American influence and American ideals of beauty.

If you don't believe me well lets just say China has Walmart, KFC, and even Hooters. Popular restaurants in Japan happen to be (believe it or not) McDonald's and Pizza Hut.

The connection here is the fact that not only are our businesses moving overseas but also our ideals of beauty. The two photos up top clearly shows how these women or should I say actresses are essentially changing their faces to match American Caucasian features such as light skin.

A link that proves that American ideals of beauty are being assimilated by our brothers and sisters in Asia is a youtube video of a hooters restaurant in China which of course makes its best attempt to mimic American ideals of beauty for women.

It’s simply hair!

            Hair, what does it really matter? Well, it matters as much as we can imagine. The false perceptions of a girl having long hair being complete women verses a women with short hair being a dyke come into playing an important role. It’s unbelievable how a women’s length of hair can question their sexual orientation or even how feminine they are. This is all the causes of models posing with long, silky, and beautiful hair in the cover of magazines and fashion shoots. Nowadays, long hair is the full definition of who is straight or who is a “dyke”. How it is that hair got to be such an important factor to define what is we are? The answer lies upon the media and the way society set the standards of women’s’ hair length. Not to go too far in supporting the idea that magazines play a big role in the hair issue; one of my good friends I have says “oh look at that girl, she’s definitely a dyke, look at the hair and just the way she cut it.”  Then the question reverses to the men that let their hair grow out, they must simply be gay. Well, that’s wrong!!! Since the standards are set on men to have short hair then men shouldn’t have long hair but men still let their hair grow out. If you take a look at when you’re out with friends, there are many men with long hair but they are not expected to be judged by no means since their “power” as its stated protects them from this. What kind of crap is this? The solution to this is to change our mind set on setting standard on simple things like hair. Let people be who they want to be and stop looking at things that don’t matter as much. We as humans get this drilled into our mentality by the everyday crap that’s in the media but we need to look far beyond that. If we close our mind then just let this information sinks in then we are caught up with other ignorant people. “Never judge a book from its cover”

you with all those curves and me without no brakes :)

After having read the articles about weight differences between the different ethnic women, and the hair difference between most ethnicities as well, I have to say I do agree with the points that were made throughout these readings. I agree on the fact that having different ethnicities requires to live up to different standards of your physical body. For example, in the Latina culture, everyone loves a woman with curves, most of my friends say they rather be with girls who have curves and some meat on their bones than just a walking stick. I am not saying that is for all the guy but it is for most cases. I think Latinos have this standard especially for women that they need to have curves and take care of themselves. This standard may change with ethnicity, black men probably like their women different. Also, with the hair, most of my friends rather have long hair than short hair. Most of my guy friends that I also asked what they preferred, if short hair or long hair, most of them admitted that they like long hair, that it makes a girl look more sophisticated and more like a women. They said that a woman with beautiful hair can make up for a flaw they may have. Personally, I will never cut my hair short, I love long hair, I feel like it makes me more feminine.

blog #5 hair

I would definitely consider hair a major importance to most girls all over the world, but especially with black women. My best friend is black and her hair is VERY important to her. We have actually had many conversations about the differences of our hair. I could get out of the shower, brush my hair and it would dry fairly straight. My friend would never even think of getting her hair wet in the shower, period. When getting ready to go out, my makeup and clothes are the two most important things I worry about. For my friend, her hair is most important. She could care less if her makeup is done or what shes wearing, as long as her hair is done and looking good. We laugh about the amount of money I spend on clothes because she spends the same amount on hair and maintaining it.
Her hair is just so different and needs much more maintenance than mine so for her to ever be discriminated against because of her hairstyle (like I read in the article) would just blow my mind. That is not right it any way.
I also feel that length and hairstyle definitely shape peoples view of a woman's femininity. The shorter the hair the more masculine and the longer the hair the more feminine. That seems to just be the way society sees it and it probably wont change for a very long time.

Hair is Powerful

These readings remind of the movie, Good Hair, that explores the different hairstyles of african american women. The movie interviews black actresses and experiences with hair throughout their lives. What I found surprising is that most of the actresses spent thousands upon thousands of dollars straightening and getting weaves for their hair. Most of the women (actresses and regular women)were to the point of addiction with the amounts of money they spent on their hair and the alarming part was that the women who weren't rich consciously knew that they spent all of their money on their hair and barely had money to afford anything else in their life. I think this goes back to black women trying to fit an unrealistic beauty standard perpetuated through dominant white culture. Many black women are trying to fit this ideal of what they believe a beautiful women is supposed to be but are failing to understand that that what is considered beautiful is a construction of white dominant culture. Ideas of what is considered beautiful transcend race and what is beautiful to white culture is different from black culture. Black women often don braids, dreds, afros, and bald hair to go against constructions of beauty. As well I find it interesting in Ingrid Banks research the degree to which women identify their hair (long) with femininity and sexuality. Particularly as women have dreds or bald hair they are thought to be less feminine because they are deviating from dominant white cultural norms for beauty. I think it speaks to the level of how women particularly black women are judged on their femininity by the style of their hair.

The Dos and Don't of (Hair)Dos

Of course hair still matters! We live in a time where most people are worried about how they look or how others view them. Most of what the women said in the article, “Hair Still Matters” is basically true. It is not only true for African America women but for most women in general as well. It’s horrible to think that something on our bodies, other than genitalia, can define a woman as a woman. The ugly reality is that to most women, their hair is everything and is the one thing that defines them.
If a woman’s hair cut is too short, it can cut down on her femininity; therefore she has to compensate for her do by dressing more like a woman, using every piece of jewelry and using all the makeup she owns to make sure people know she’s a woman or be considered gay. However if a man has long locks he wouldn’t be considered to swing for the other team. Maybe from the back he could be mistaken for a woman but that would just depend of how he dresses. With women there is only the in-between. If hair is too short they are considered lesbian, hair can be long but not in dreds or they might be considered lesbians. No matter what I guess there will always be limits for the women.
I think that this need to have the “perfect” hair not only comes from unattainable hair goals in the media but self esteem issues too. I’m not too proud to say that I often have the need for perfect hair most days. I have an unfortunate combination of wavy and frizzy hair that can make me feel good or bad. Some fear comes from the standards of society and horrible self esteem issues when it comes to my appearance. No matter what kind of hair we have, we are never satisfied; it’s too short or too long, too high or too flat, too dry or too oily. The list goes on for miles. The point is that our hair can define us and, believe it or not, makes us unique. It’s kind of cheesy to say but it still is true!

The Ugly Duckling

Jessica Valenti's chapter on beauty gets right to the point of what and where America gets its ideas of beauty. No matter what we do, I think that the woman will always be concerned about how she looks or how she wants to look. Politically, women will be seen as an ugly duckling always because we can't make everyone happy. As Valenti says, either you're too naturally pretty or you fixed yourself to look that way and people will always criticize.
Naomi Wolf compares the African societies of Nigeria to our society and she says that in the Woodabe tribe the men spend much of their time putting on make-up or doing their hair all to lead up to a beauty contest judged by women! This to us may seem a bit odd and because of the gender stereotypes we have here, it may seem a bit feminine coming from the men who do it. But in this tribe they give the female power, the power to choose. In a video I saw last semester about this tribe, it portrays the people equal and they both seek out to look beautiful for each other. The women wear their best clothing and accessories and the men compete to see who looks better. In a ceremony the men dance and who ever is chosen the winner gets to spend time with the chosen female of that year. Surprisingly the female chooses whether or not to have sex with him and she even gets to pick how many men she wants to have sex with at the same time and is NOT seen as a whore. That could be a little too much for us but what would happen if we did admire male beauty? I guess the real question is: Could we admire male beauty without classifying men as gay or metrosexual? Perhaps we should turn the tables and call the men the ugly ones. How much damage would it cause them if we called them UGLY? We see how it causes disorders and surgeries on females but would the men go to that extreme?

blog #4

After reading about the beauty myth, I don't believe that the way men portray women and how women want to look will ever change. I also dont think that the beauty myth is all mans' fault. it seems that women gave in to this image and ran with it. It is the women that continue to get plastic surgery and become bolemic and anorexic in order to fit the "beauty" image. Yes of course all women want to be desirable, and men set that standard, but the definition of desirable varies with every man and for women to think they have to look a certain way in order to be beautiful is because of our own insecurities. Just like women feel they need to look a certain way in order to be accepted, I believe it is becoming the same way for men now too. They, too, need to be fit and handsome to be socially accepted.
I just found out about a year ago the Marilyn Monroe was a plus size model and she was very beautiful and desired. This proves my point that anyone can be beautiful and it is societies fault as a whole as to why there is a certain standard for beauty.

My ta-tas. My weapon. My crutch.

I love my boobs, knockers, rack, twins, tits, whatever, you choose to call them. These 34D’s of milk-giving, sex appealing, pairs of adipose may be my greatest asset besides my brain of course!

Wait, what? You can’t have a brain and a nice rack?!

Sure I can and I like many other girls out there know this.

I actually feel more advantageous over men—in certain, matters of course. I don’t believe that my sex appeal or lack thereof will get me whatever I want, whenever. But I understand that wearing the low-cut shirt will make my guy friends do whatever I want…sometimes. Am I blinded by these kind gestures because I happened to be wearing a tight shirt one cold morning and my friend happened to have noticed and bought my coffee? Perhaps.

Oh, great I can already read the comments explaining that the objectification of women and creating her as a sex object reverts long years of activism. Blah, blah, blah and that my thinking is only reinforcing ideologies that create women as sex symbols and Wolf’s argument of the beauty myth.

Do you heart that? It’s the snickering of feminists-minded girls commenting on how I’ve devalued women and commenting on what a narcissistic bitch I am. “Look at this girl! She thinks her experiences apply to every woman in the world!”

I knew what I was getting myself into when I was writing this post in the wee hours of the morning, but guess what? I didn’t want to regurgitate what I read and complacently agree with every word the authors were writing out about. I mostly wrote this post to get more attention. Am I a narcissist, attention grabbing bitch who only knows how to express herself through a mandatory blog post for fear of being seen as too honest and too opinionated?

Yes.

Can you note the low self-esteem emanating from every word I type?

Yes.

Really I wanted to do this to make people angry. Particularly, the girl populous in this women studies class. Do you even know if I am girl? For all you know I could be one of the few numbered boys in the class. Or am I? Oh, how anonymity has its advantages.

Valenti and Wolf have made many valid points about how the construction of beauty has debased years of feminist activism and the measures every woman has to go to reach such standards to fulfill this mold of beauty.

In my opinion, boobs are the greatest thing besides the reinvention of the blanket aka the Snuggie (I am in no way endorsing this product).

What can I say? I use my body because that’s how I’ve played it for most of my post-pubescent life. I understand the magnitude of how strong sex influences. My teen years were a time of discovery. I pushed aside my ragged rock band Queen t-shirt and embraced the power of the push-up bra.

I am glad I have breasts. Sure, this blog post completely diverts away from the points Valenti, and Wolf made about how the concept of beauty has been distorted to suit the androcentric, sexist society we live by keeping the women population under control, but I confess when I wear a low-cut shirt and my cute lacy bra I feel great! Why? Because I like the attention and because I feel the most confident. I see nothing wrong with having to flaunt with what I’ve got. (Most) guys have their big muscles and good looks, but that’s about all. Sure they can’t go around waiving their penis around to get what they want because men don’t have what we have. I know, I know, women shouldn’t have to use such a strategy to get attention because not every woman has big breasts and “good looks” but do you see how my mentality is making you hate me even more?

Love your boobs. Don’t feel confident about yourself? Think you need plastic fun bags and is willing to go under knife and endure weeks of numbing pain? Go for it! Why must most women subject themselves to thinking that her body isn’t perfect? What are years of emotional scarring and trauma to a few weeks of pain and therapy. Will every woman reach the degree to which they can fully satisfied? I don’t know. Can I guarantee that every woman in the class this morning will hate me? Heck, yes!

Have I succeeded to make you angry? Have I showed you the extremities I had to go to make you understand that beauty is constructed under these certain societal standards that every girl tries to achieve? Will you change your ways? Are you willing to change for the betterment of humankind? Are you willing to sacrifice your “beauty” to prove it in society’s face—men—that the way you look is not for them but yourself?

Beauty Is In the Eye of the Man

I would like to start with a little bit of background information to give a sense of my frame of mind and maybe some better understanding. As a white male, with the many priveleges associated, growing up was a time of clear right and wrong, good and bad, natural and unatural. Life was so good to me that I did not have time to recognize other peoples problems, only my own. I lived this way until I was a teenager and realized that other peoples problems were often bigger than mine and needed to be recognized as well.

After reading Naomi Wolf's, The Beauty Myth, I began to think back to my childhood and see how a lot of the things she said were very apparent. I saw, and still see, the effects that the media had on my sister and female cousin. Both of them have had security issues growing up, as mostly any other girls would. When I saw these things happening to them I saw them as objects of nature, not products of male dominant media and society. What I also did not see was how there was a message hidden in my sisters's and cousins' cause for suffering. The media has given females close to me, and everywhere, a false image of "beauty", and with it oppression and suffering. The media has given me, and other men everywhere, a false sense of superioty and ignorance.

In a way, the white male dominated media is mediating all of our thoughts and beliefs. Minorities are not the only ones being oppressed anymore. A step in achieving equality would be shattering the medias false image of women. Replacing the image would be very difficult as well.

Being a women is not easy

"Ugly is powerful" gosh it really is!! I think being called ugly is one of the most hurtful things, right after being called a bitch. I remember when I was younger, I thought I had the hairiest arms compared to all my friends. And wanted SO bad to shave them but my parents were completely against it. I think I was in 6th grade at this time? I hated them so much! My own family; my brothers and cousins would call me "hairy mary." I think it was a year later I was at a girl cousin's house whom was older and she talked me into shaving my arms and the hell with it I did! My parents were pissed off of course but it made me feel better. Gosh, I was in the 7th grade and already trying to meet standards!

When the new show Bridalplasty hit the air on E! network I literally dropped my jaw and could not believe what the hell this world is coming to! I've never seen an episode and don't plan to however, the point of the show is for the brides-to-be to compete and who ever wins literally gets cut, with plastic surgery. This show seems very similar to the show Jessica Valenti explains to us in this chapter, The Swan. I agree with her when she talks about the doctors because that is the most shocking to me. They're okay with this! A women to change the way she looks because she's soon to be married. Bridalplasty is pretty much telling all the young girls and teen aged girls that this is beauty, and beauty is to get cosmetic surgery especially before your wedding day.

Now, the most surprising part of this ready was vagina beauty standards. I had no idea there was even a such thing as vaginal rejuvenation surgery. I really thought this was a complete joke. So I decided to do some research on it and what I saw the most popular words when describing this were the words "vagina tightening procedure." It was sickening to me that women around the world are actually doing this. Oh and this procedure can cost up to $9000 dollars. Then I kept reading and there is really a such a thing as a hymen replacement?! I cringed completely and had to stop.

Young women being the center of this beauty cult is due to the negative media our society has portrayed. We're supposed to look a certain way and act a certain way or we're ugly. But wait, if we meet up to those standards and dress cute or sexy then we're sluts? It seems like we're never going to win this war of beauty. I of course fall into this category and I can admit it. I too spend so much money on clothes, shoes, and make up. But I too know that I don't need all this to make me happy, I do it because I like to look a certain way. I have always loved me for me and I won't let society take me down.

To Be A Woman

Being a woman requires a lot of work… Days off are the perfect time to get those things done! Don’t forget about that mani/pedi appointment, tanning session, shopping for clothes and make-up, and of course that boob job!! Uh, NOT! While those things can be nice if you do it for yourself here and there, for some girls that’s simply their way of life, day by day. They think they need these things to be this hot person to impress others, men especially. Being a girl I will say I have never had a pedicure, and every person I’ve ever told has gave me the reaction, “No way!? Why not, you’re a girl! You have to get a pedi at least once in your life!” No, thank you. When I read the chapter “Beauty Cult” I kept thinking of my life and all the girls I know that fit into the different topics related to beauty. It’s all so true! Girls are known for their shopping. And what do they shop for? Basically clothes and make-up, like the book said. All the money girls spend on these products is insane. The things we do to keep people from calling us ugly are ridiculous. I asked a male friend of mine, “How would you react if someone called you ugly, whether you knew them or not?” He said he wouldn’t care. He’d be over it, no problem. A lot of guys don't seem to care about that "ugly factor". I told him that if someone said I was ugly, from my opinion as a female, I’d be pretty upset by it whether it was from a kid, teen, peer, adult, or just anyone. Girls seem to be much more sensitive about their looks. It would definitely bother me. I would look at myself and try to figure out what is wrong – I’m not a size 0, so is my size 7 too big? How can I change it? It definitely has that sting. Everyone wants to look good. I know I do. I’ve been saying I need to lose weight and get back in shape for the longest time, before summer hits so I can have that bikini body – but I have yet to work on it! Having a boyfriend makes me not care so much about my looks though. I figure, he knows how I look when I’m all dressed up and he knows how I look when I look like hell, so who cares these days. However, when I do get dressed up to go out, I always ask him how I look and if I should change or anything because in the end I do still care about what I look like and how others think of me, because guys aren’t the only ones that judge, I’d say girls are even worse!

It’s a Lose-Lose Situation

As I was reading through Beauty Cult in the Full Frontal Feminism book all I could think of is how messed up our society is. I read and underlined key phrases such as “ugly is powerful,” “it’s killing us,” “suffer for beauty,” “hating yourself,” etc. These phrases were the key in opening stored memories of my childhood and adolescent years. Although Valenti’s focus is on “overweigh” women and young girls, I couldn’t help but recall my personal memories. I was always considered too skinny in the eyes of my childhood friends, family and high school peers.

Ugly is powerful. It really is! I always had nicknames such as skinny bone jones, spaghetti legs, skinny banana (just because I wore a yellow shirt one day), and twig. I did not like any of these names and it made me mad but I kept it to myself. I feel that these names led to me being shy, unconfident, unspoken, belittled, and reserved.

It’s killing us. It was killing me. As I entered my teenage years I was constantly asked if I was bulimic and/or anorexic… I was seriously neither. No one believed me – including my family! I think this led to some depression. I felt that what I had to say didn’t matter, which further made me all of the above mentioned.

Suffer for beauty. I always tried to eat to my maximum potential to try to gain weight. Most of the time I “suffered” from stomach aches, food comas, and feelings of being unhealthy. I wanted to be perfect and gain weight in all the right places, so I excessively exercised only focusing on attaining sexy legs and a flat stomach.

Hating yourself. I hated being too skinny, too shy, too insecure, too unspoken…I hated who I was far too often. I hated being asked if I had an eating disorder every other week. I hated being flat from the front and the back. I hated myself – congratulations society. Wood’s article further supports this point by indicating that even successful women feel this sense of self-hatred, physical obsession, and dread of lost control (p.487).

Our culture had portrayed this perfect woman in media and has implanted at such a young age that women should always strive to be/look in a certain way. It’s sickening to see how society has made women so concerned about their appearance. It’s a distraction that has a hidden agenda- to oppress women. While a female student spends 1 hour of her time getting ready to go to school, her male counterpart is perfecting his essay/homework/assignment. While a woman is spending money on cosmetics and boobs, a man is spending his money on “logical” things such as education, investments, and home purchases.

As I was applying on mascara today, I accidently caught some in my eye, it was not pleasant. Then I thought, eyelashes are suppose to keep particles and irritants out of our eyes and here we (women) are defeating the purpose of them! This incident reminded me of the article If Men Could Menstruate, where it mentions white skin being superior, but went in fact it’s more subject to ultraviolet rays and wrinkles. It all ties back to oppression; in my mascara scenario its “to keep male dominance intact” as Wood stated (p. 488). Basically society wants you to think your ugly, no matter how you look- your too fat, your too skinny, it’s a lose-lose situation for many women.

Maxi-Pads for the Big Boys

As soon as I read the title “If Men Could Menstruate” I thought, oh this ought to be good… Before I got started on the reading, I began considering how I think men would respond if they were blessed with a monthly menstruation period. At first I thought, men wouldn’t be able to handle it. The mood swings, the bloating, the unbearable cramps, the blood, and the terrible craving for chocolate all seem too much for a man to handle every single month. Sure they can possibly take exterior pain such as a cut on the arm or smack in the face, but when it comes to pain that they can’t control and that is caused within, they can be such babies. However, as I began reading, Gloria Steinem mentions that if suddenly men could menstruate and women could not, it would turn into, as Steinem said, “an enviable, boast-worthy, masculine event: Men would brag about how long and how much.” I couldn’t help but start laughing! Not only did I think the idea was hilarious, but considering the idea that men would actually use it to be even more superior and boastful about it was SO true! It would make such a dramatic change to society. If men could in fact menstruate, they would get away with so much of what women still struggle with today, the power justifications would increase almost indefinitely if men were given everything a woman can do. I guess it’s a good thing men don’t have monthly menstruation periods, we don’t need another thing for guys to boast about constantly, although I do wish they were able to experience it at least once so that they could know and understand what women have to go through every month for almost their entire lives. After reading this article I thought to myself, what if the roles of men and women were switched entirely for a whole week or even a month? Both men and women would be able to see how it feels living life as the opposite sex. Only then, we could grasp what it’s like to be a man and a woman in society. Just like they say, there are two sides to every story, the same goes for men and women, each are loaded with their own advantages and disadvantages, and it would be beneficial to all if one would stand out of their own element for once and see what it could be like living in someone else's shoes for a change.

Female Behavior

The sculpture is called the Venus of Willendorf. It’s estimated to be made from 22,000 to 21,000 BCE. This figure is believed to be a representation of female fertility. This was considered to be maybe a stone-age doll or maybe even a goddess. Relating this to our magazines or victoria secret models we have today, the definition of beauty has changed quite a bit. The voluptuous stomach and thighs are so different from what we expect from women now. What is beauty? I always questioned myself. Today, my younger sister had no idea our family were going out to eat dinner, and she had only ten minutes to get ready. Sitting on the couch with her PJs, she panics and goes straight to putting on her make-up. I asked her what made her worry so much, and to my shock, she honestly replied, “what if there is a cute guy in the restaurant.” This concept of “beauty” is our way of approval in society. Which means, we as women, still hold onto the fact that men are the dominant role. We are stuck or trapped in this midst of self identity. I think it’s definitely harder for women, due to us wanting individuality but also seeking for control as a successful woman through the eyes of men.

It is a myth. Beauty myth claims to be about the celebration of women when in fact it is about the institutional power of men. This myth is an illusion that creates this confusion for women from when they were first revealed on how they should look. Physical attraction was one thing, but beauty became another. This beauty myth shows the behavior more than the appearance, its based in the period on what is desirable. But then again, even after the problem was discovered, I still feel that women still don’t feel free, they are underneath this hidden mask. There is no space to let go and fully gain self worth because it’s all for social virtue.

Does it matter how we look?

After reading The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf I began to think of how it is true that beauty is a myth. Women are always worrying about how we look. Should i wear this dress or this skirt? But, when we are making those questions we are really questioning whether people will approve of it specially the important man in our lifes. A couple of years back I can say i didn't really care how I looked. I could be in my pj's when i walked out the door to go to school and i could care less. Not until i got my first job that it began to hit me of my outer apperance. And this was only because I kept listening to my co-workers talking about how they looked and that they had to go to the gym to lose those extra pounds. Now before i leave home to come to school I take one last look in the mirror, which seems to be too obsessive. But as it was stated in The Beauty Myth what we consider beauty where we live others might consider ugly where they live.
Beauty has come to be the main role in every womens life that it is becoming a bigger issue each and everyday. I also recall of when i first began working at the elementary that I work at a first grade girl not eating her snack because it had too many calories and she didn't want to get fat. This was a six year old girl. Very sad that at that age she could not enjoy a simple snack. So, the Beauty Myth has come a far way. For it to be erased will take a stronger effort from women, who already have alot to do.

Wishful thinking...

After reading the article "If Men Could Menstruate", it got me thinking just how big of a deal men would really make out of it. I have always said that men have it so easy because they don't have to worry about their looks, give birth, or have a period! I think if men were to have a period, it would be a whole different story. It wouldn't be an on going joke to say "it's that time of the month", which I hear from plenty of men that are a part of my life today. If I'm in a bad mood or don't seem happy, the first remark out of their mouth involves either being on my period or wondering if I'm just "pms-ing". When I was younger my brother would pick fights with me and bug me until I yelled at him and his fighting words always consisted of "Gosh are you on your period?" or "When are you gonna start?". My mom was always on my side because she could empathize. My dad on the other hand, still thinks it's funny to joke about till this day he teases me. I always wished that men could be able to menstruate and give birth and feel what it's like to be a women and have these things happening to them. In the article when Steinem asks, "What would happen for instance, if suddenly, magically, men could menstruate and women could not?" Her answer, "-Menstruation would become an enviable, boast-worthy, masculine event:Men would brag about how long and how much." I think that she couldn't have said it better, anything that men go through typically is transformed and expected to be enviable. I definitely think the on going jokes and humor about menstruating would stop, and we wouldn't be able to joke about "that time of the month", because we aren't going through it. Even though women are going through it now, if men went through it, it would be seen as a triumphant thing that takes a "real man" to survive and come out alive. It's interesting how things quickly change when a man experiences it compared to woman.

Pain is NOT Beauty

It's amazing to hear and read about things women put themselves through just to look a certain way. Why? What's wrong with being a size 6 or 8? What's wrong with having a certain distinguishing feature on your face? Nothing. Except, magazines, ads, commercials, etc. tell us we are wrong. We have to look like a Victoria's Secret model to be noticed and appreciated. I've heard of models have ribs removed to create a more appealing torso. There is so much pain involved in creating a "hot chick". Starting from the head: burning hair to curl or straighten hair, face: waxing or threading, upper body: waxing, lower body: shaving ( razor cuts are not fun to get), feet: four inch heels. This is only a small part of what many women do to "improve" themselves. There is a standard for women that prioritizes beauty. I was shocked to hear about women getting surgery in "the land down under". The body is such a beautiful thing and it was so mind boggling to me that anyone would have surgery to have a "prettier" vagina. Full Frontal Feminism opened my eyes to how much beauty is required of girls. Decades ago, it was desirable for women to be fuller and curvier. I recall a scene in The Devil Wears Prada where Stanley Tucci's character says "0 became the new 2 and 2 became the new 4" which was referring to waist size in the modeling industry. When Anne Hathaway says she was size 6 he replies "which is the new 14". The first time I saw this movie, I thought that line was hilarious. After reading "Beauty Cult", it made me think twice about the beauty standards of today. Another scene was when Emily Blunt's character starved herself for weeks and has the famous line "I'm one stomach flu away from my goal weight". Her desire to be thin slowly ate away at her. Literally. It's still one of my favorite movies of all time; it just makes me think a bit more now.

Beauty, beauty, and more beauty!!!

The beauty of women is based simply on how we look from the outside. If we have a great body with great assets that make us beautiful therefore we belong in the group of beautiful girl only. For example, in magazines such as “Seventeen” where young, pretty girls are portrayed on the outside cover of the magazine advocates young girl to be skinny in order to fit in the category of being beautiful not ugly. Nowadays, girls in high school are more worried in having a great looking body at whatever the price is than their educational goals. Examples such as the Olsen twins, who are teen celebrities, were starving themselves to fit the perfect image of what beauty is.  Having the image of beautiful goes hand in hand with the consumption of expense beauty products along with expense beauty procedures that can be health risking. Women who are not skinny take the big risk of liposuction, that’s an example of contributing to consumptions of buying beauty but the question is “Is it really worth?”. The women who take this route to be beautiful know what the health risk can be but they want to beautiful according to the standards magazines, media, and men put on them. Girls who are not skinny sometimes feels out of place with their friends that are skinny, it has happened to friends I know. The overall message that is portrayed about beauty is if you have the beauty, we’re just simply conceited about how good we look. If we don’t fit the qualities of beauty, we are simply just not noticed in society.

Men Might Need Vicodin for Those Cramps

At first glance of the title “If Men Could Menstruate,” I thought this would be a piece about how men would be ashamed or not be able to handle menstruation. So when I started reading about how it would just be one more thing men could do that women couldn’t, it kind of ticked me off. I know it’s a badge of honor for men to shed blood but come on, “Cool I can bleed through my junk,” sound like something everyone would want. I know men like to taunt others with things they can do and others can’t, but I don’t think it would be something to brag about, considering most guys don’t even like to mention the words menstruation, period or time of the month (TOM for short). I think I just gave away to code word!
Call me an optimist but I do not imagine the world still male dominated if men could menstruate. Since menstruation is supposed to prepare you for childbirth, men would have to give birth. This would mean men having much more time off and not being able to climb up the ladder. This would also leave more space for women to have time to climb up the ladder. If there was an entire role reversal, it would be logical for women to dominate over men because they would have the better options. If men really got every symptom, mood swing and pain that comes with a period I’m fairly sure they would consider it a curse. They might not be open to show their emotions in public like girls would but I’m sure that with their cramps, fatigue and muscle aches would be like going through the looking glass. In the end I think male menstruation seems quit bizarre, but I did like the thought of men using sanitary supplies! I would like to know how a guy would feel sticking a tampon up their male vagina or whatever they want to call it!

The Iron Maiden

In the essay The Beauty Myth, the author presents the notion of the Iron Maiden. As she exposes in her writing this is a device in which individuals are trapped, they suffer through starvation or the metal spikes that are fixed in the casket. The Iron Maiden represents for many women if not all, the beauty trap. There are certain standards in every society; in our society the norm for women is to be as thin as a stick, to have flawless skin, luscious hair, perky breasts and round bottoms. Women by far contrast to men are trapped by the ideals of beauty that society imposes on them. Many women look themselves in the mirror and see distorted images of themselves. They see in their reflection doubt, frustration, fear and insufficiency. They doubt that they are not good enough, they are frustrated by they beauty norms they do not fulfill, they fear their image defines them and many times they feel like despite of everything they accomplish that they lack what society wants from them. And how can we not feel this way if in every turn we make there is a magazine or a billboard reminding us of what a we “should” look like. I myself cannot walk through a store without feeling anxious; I start questioning myself how many pounds do I need to loose to fit into that dress? Or how many sit-ups do I have to do to look good in that pair of shorts? The real question is why do I have to make myself fit into anything? Why can’t I just be me and be ok with the weight I have? This should be every woman’s questioning, so we can then work to redefine the beauty standards.

"I'm a Three-Pad Man!!"

While reading through the article written by Gloria Steinem, “If Men Could Menstruate” I laughed from most of the remarks that it said. I found it very interesting and shocking at how men would react if they had a period or better yet if they could give birth. Through the years, women have been seen as weak, soft and delicate due to this monthly happening, but they are never found unique or something a girl brags about, at least most women, not all of them. I find it funny that if men could menstruate, it would be something to brag about, and they would feel even more superior and special just for the fact that they are men, and they would still find a way to consider themselves superior to us. It may not be real, but just the thought of it scares me because then where would women stand? Women would still be considered inferior and anything possible that a woman does will still not make them equal to man. Sad to say but that is the way society has been raised and the way people have raised and influenced the thinking within their nuclear families and if it were to be miraculously possible I am pretty sure that is how men would be portrayed, they would be placed on an altar.

If Men Could Give Birth

I found myself laughing, but also nodding as I read through “If Men Could Menstruate”. For so long, menstruation has been an intimate topic often blamed for a women’s moodiness; some women are even embarrassed to mention the word period, let alone admit to being on that “time of the month”. This reading shows how even the biological aspects of our life can have meanings that have been culturally constructed. For example, when talking about women having periods, meanings of “bitchiness” and delicacy have been associated with menstruation; when men menstruate, meanings of power and competition come into play. This shows that no matter what is attributed toward men, they end up above women; when men menstruate, menstruation becomes a privilege that gives men a higher position that women cannot uphold. The article shows how social constructions of power and superiority will be linked to menstruation if it became a part of a mans life, it would also attribute competition between men, in other words it would become a trophy for men and an object of desire for women.

It came to mind that the same principles would be applied if men could suddenly give birth and women could not. Men would be praised for having the power to develop a new life inside of him and competitions regarding the belly size, size of the baby, length of delivery, and the pain intensity would arise. Men would be seen as being even stronger because they have become responsible for carrying another human being inside of them. Men would be able to argue against the usefulness of women since men hold the power of giving birth. Being able to give birth would be a phenomenon that only reinforces male superiority since they have become responsible for delivering new life into this world. Nonetheless, women would be left powerless and subordinate to men. Pregnancy would no longer be seen as something magical, emotional, and maternal as it is today; instead, it would be seen as a powerful privilege that only reinforces man’s strength and power.